The Hypocrisy of the Social Order

This is my first blog post and it’s gonna be about “heteronormativity.” Big word, eh? Well, I thought so too, the first time I learned about it. But gradually it became so simple to understand, all thanks to the way its meaning was communicated. There’s a reason why I chose to write about this for my first blog, and that’s because this was one of the first few discussions in my first semester of studying literature (while discussing “Lihaaf,” Ismat Chughtai) that completely transformed my perception towards the society we co-exist with. Our society wants us to “act” in a certain way, because those are the “norms” created by who? Society! Our society wants us to dress up in a certain way, portray ourselves in a certain way. Well, if that wasn’t enough, it wants us to also “have sex” in a certain way! It provides us with a prescribed manual of who to have sex with (the opposite gender), why to have sex (to make a baby), and when to have sex (after marriage, duh!).

Let’s talk about the social norm projected for human beings. We are homo-sapiens, yet, we are supposed to be “heterosexuals.” Do you spot the irony here? How “homo” and “hetero” simultaneously describe us? Well, that’s not all the irony that exists. Have you noticed the contradiction that how if you’re attracted towards the “opposite sex,” you’re straight? Last time I checked, didn’t “straight” mean going in the same direction? But when it comes to sex, it means being a hetero. *Slow claps for society.* We know what you did there! You just changed the meaning of words as per your convenience.

Now moving on to the word “gay.” When did the word, which means “happy,” start emanating such a negative connotation? How confused are we? Why can’t gays be a regular part of the society? Just because they don’t reproduce? How dumb are we to notice how that will be such a huge favor to everyone? How being heterosexual has led to the population of the world being more than 7.5 Billion? That’s a mammoth number to cater to. Aren’t all the world problems augmenting due to population growth? Can’t we just be thankful to homosexuals for getting out of the closet, and encourage more to do so?

Not only the world is affected, but imagine how damaging it can be for a person to be with a woman, when every nerve in his body is telling him to kiss the man he’s attracted to and share his life with him. I remember watching Brokeback Mountain, and thinking how the protagonists Ennis and Jack not only live their lives in suffering, but also inflict that pain on their respective partners of the opposite sex.

You got no fuckin idea how bad it gets. I’m not you. I can’t make it on a couple a high-altitude fucks once or twice a year. You’re too much for me. Ennis, you son of a whoreson bitch. I wish I knew how to quit you.

—Jack Twist, Brokeback Mountain

Not only this, when I watched Moonlight, I realized how difficult it is to grow up with your inhibitions and being mocked and bullied over and over again for who you are.

Therefore, all I want to say is:

Dear Society,

Your norms are the greatest disaster to the world. High time you start realizing it. You need to grow up, look around, and analyze what’s best for us as human beings. Only then, you and I can co-exist!

P.S. Cheers to the gay club!

You’re not a shame, you’re a gem.

You’re not a curse, you’re a miracle.

You rock, for having the courage to be yourself!

(Because most of us are hypocrites!)


One thought on “The Hypocrisy of the Social Order

  1. Well written post. I couldn’t help smiling at your little quips about how homo-sapiens are supposed to be heterosexual and whatnot. Clever thinking. The following is comment is not a detailed line-by-line analysis(that would need more time), but merely my first thoughts.

    I am not entirely sure I follow your concept of society. Reading your essay it appears to me that you perceive society as a separate entity that exists in a distanced independence from the individual and exerts influence over him. If that is true, it begs the question: who created this “society”? Who controls these “norms” you speak of? When you say “society tells us to do x” – who exactly are the individuals doing the telling?

    Would it not seem more reasonable to assume then, that society is merely a name we have given to the sum total of signs and meanings that we as sentient beings developed through the course of our movement in time? And if that is the case, wouldn’t it also follow that any “norms” that are said to be “created by society” are just that, a collection of values that have risen out of our collective understanding of the world?

    While I do appreciate your efforts to uncover the contradictions inherent within a society’s cultural logic, I believe it would do better to attempt any inquiry into such an intricate and historic construct without giving in to the temptation of an antagonistic, even belligerent flavour of moralizing that I detect in your essay. Norms have a reason for existing, and a patient, nuanced examination of them would go further in establishing an order that ensures basic dignity for everyone regardless of their sexual orientation without causing erosion of the bedrock upon which civilization is based.

    Keep writing!


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